I am very pissed right now. Totally. I simply dun understand why my father likes to discourage me so much, i guess it gives him sadistic pleasure. That is also the reason why i dread going out to eat with my family on weekends. I rather eat on my own, and do my stuffs more productively.
As usual, he was up to the suaning mood again, and he commented that he dun understand why i always slp so late, and he was like u only in jc leh, yr sister last time oso nv slp so late. Den i say i not as clever as her wat, of cuz need to work harder la. The next thing he said pissed me off. " Aiya, u oso not scholar type work so hard oso no use la, now wat u tell me i oso wun believe la, PSLE u failed me, O levels u failed me again, still wan me believe ur lies for 2 more years?"
I wanted to shout all the vulgarities i could think of back, but i din, cuz more trouble will just follow afterwards. Thus i jus shut up on my entire journey back home with my MP3 on. HE condemns me just becuz i din perform well for my O levels, i knew it, he had been remembering this for dno how many mths. When we visit relatives, he will say the god same old thing, and laugh.
PPl who read this pls dun tell me to think that he is trying to motivate me, i have thought tt way for the past 5 years, and nth changes, in fact it got worst. Perhaps i dun reallie fancy such a method of motivation bah, I reallie cannot stand the way he is, commenting and telling me all this shit, ya, my sister is good, she is in uni, i am not. She is in the top notch jc while i am not. Whatever she does is correct and whatever i do is wrong.
Fucked up.
